Have you ever had one of those days where ripping out your own internal organs would feel better than what you're dealing with now? Well today is just one of those days. I'm not usually needy or over emotional, but today my emotions are all over the place. I'm angry, I'm sad, I feel alone...you name it, I'm feeling it. I'm not in self-pity mode, I'm just trying to let off some steam without doing anything irrational the only way I really know how...through writing.
First off, not even an hour after I woke up this morning, my mother called me to give some bad news about Rocky, our dog. Rocky is a full blooded Pit Bull that I got as a birthday gift from a friend three years ago. He never hurt anybody, he wasn't mean, hell, he grew up with our cat, so he probably think he is a cat! Anyway, some roughneck wannabes in my neighborhood thought it would be funny(?) to sneak into our back yard and tie another dog onto Rocky's leash. Well as you can guess, they fought like...well...dogs. And it seems my dog got it worse than the other. He was really beat up and for what? A laugh? A prank? I'm so pissed off by that very idea that some human being would want to do that to somebody else's pet. My mother heard them going at it this morning and went outside to find them just sitting there. Neither of the dogs were probably vicious, but they were both scared and did what their instincts told them to do. My mom got him to the vet and he's fine now. Just hurt his leg really bad but it's not broken. They gave him a bunch of anesthetics so he's pretty much in his own little world. I'm just happy he's okay. I do wish I spent more time with him when I actually lived here. I barely even know my dog anymore, but I still love him and I don't want anything to happen to him...especially when he doesn't bother anybody. But he's safe and that's all on that.
There's also other things swarming through my mind. As I get closer to another birthday, I realize that things happen for a reason...some for good, some for bad...and others, well I don't know why something happen, but I know there is a reason. Not everybody is going to like me, not everybody is going to want to know me for who I really am, and that's okay. I'm just ready to let go of certain people and certain poisons in my life that prevent me from truly moving on with my life. Sometimes being nice isn't truly being the bigger person...sometimes being the bigger person is cutting ties that prevent us from being happy. So my second New Year's Resolution (after going to the gym more often) is to get rid of certain people in my life....it's nothing personal, just something that I need to do...and unlike the first resolution, this one will not be broken.
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